If I Had Words

Chapter 20    Chapter 22

I suddenly lifted my head from where it had been resting on Ouranos.

“What is it?” he asked.

“The children. I can hear them crying.” 

They were all making the most awful sounds deep within my earth. I could feel them pushing against me too, trying to expand and push beyond the cavern we had made for them. 

“They are fine,” Ouranos said, trying to bring me back to where we were resting.

“No,” I said, pulling away. “It feels different. It feels like something is wrong. I need to speak to them.” 

He sighed.

“I will be back and will let you know what they say,” I said.

I hurried towards their cavern, hoping that whatever it was could be resolved quickly. While we hadn’t figured out a long-term solution for what to do with the children, it had been nice having uninterrupted time with Ouranos. 

I appeared in the center of the cavern, taking in the scene and making sure no one was hurt.

“What is the matter?” 

“Mother, you must let us out,” Tethys said. “We can’t stay here. Why won’t you let us out?” 

“Your Father and I are still trying to understand what we should do. Since some of you insist on taking what is not yours,” I said, eying Kronos, “we are not sure what other things you might do.”

“What if we promise not to take from others?” Koios asked.

“I would never promise that,” Kronos said.

Some of them groaned at Kronos’s inability to be quiet. 

“If your only question was to ask how long you would need to stay in here, the answer is I do not know,” I said, turning to leave.

“Wait, Mother,” Themis said. “Why did you create us?”

The children were always asking questions and I was tired. I would keep this simple. 

“It is my purpose to create.”

The children perked up and looked at each other. 

“Do you desire to create more?” Rheia asked carefully.

I noticed more glances passed between some of them as they waited for my answer.

“Your father does not want more,” I said.

Some of their faces fell. 

“What do you want, Mother?” Themis asked. 

“I always want more,” I said.

“Will you create with another?” Iapetos asked.

“I do not want any other,” I said.

“Do you care about Father?” Rheia asked. 

“I care that he has his heavens. I care that he is there to protect us all from Khaos. I am glad he chooses to remain and protect.”

“Do you feel nothing else for him?” Tethys asked.

“I feel –.” I paused, struggling to describe what I felt about Ouranos.

“Do you love him?” Mnemosyne asked. 

I looked at her. Usually she knew what words were right. There were so many feelings, I didn’t know if ‘love’ was the right word.

“I do not know,” I said.

“Does Father love you?” she asked. 

“He says I am beautiful now. He says that he wants to be with me.”

“Perhaps you can create again with him,” Rheia said.

“Perhaps,” I said. 

Then I frowned. 

“What’s wrong?” Theia asked. 

“I am not as beautiful anymore. He will not desire me enough to want to create with me. With all of you here, I am fading. If you stay here, I may return to being ugly.” 

“Then let us out,” Rheia said. “We will make you beautiful again. We will make Ouranos desire you. You can create with him. You can be together.” 

I could not deny it was what I wanted. I longed to create more. It was my purpose. It was my power. I needed to create, to feel the flow of such energy. 

“We can help you, Mother,” Theia said. 

They had helped me before, but it had not worked. He had stayed away. 

“I do not think it can work,” I said. 

“But Father loves you just like you love him,” Mnemosyne said. “His love and your beauty will make his desire too great. He won’t be able to resist you.” 

I started pacing a little, trying to think. 

It had been nice being with Ouranos, just the two of us. Except — he always prevented us from creating. Creation was different from simply being together. Being together was good, but it was not enough. I realized how much I wanted to create, how much I needed to create. He was the only one I wanted. He was the only one I desired. Maybe I could make him desire me as much as I desired him. 

“Alright,” I said, turning to them. “I will set you free, but you must not do anything to upset your father. You must be kind to each other and work together. We must not take, except for what is needed. Your father and I placed you in my earth to protect you. We also need to protect the elements from being wasted and spent beyond what we can handle. 

“Do you promise?”

“We promise to work together and to only take what is needed,” Themis said, eying the others. 

The others readily agreed.

“Very well,” I said, feeling pleased. “I will let you out.” 

Chapter 20    Chapter 22